Website freedom design

 

you have seen my skin
all of it
yet hear we sit
in a coffee shop
by the window
and as we watch the rain
slide down the glass
we managed
still
to talk only about our day
and other basic
nonsense
as if we were still strangers

 


 

late at night
with eyes closed
my mind alive;
wild
with thoughts of you

 


 

we could of
but you closed your eyes
and looked anywhere
but at me

 

Website freedom design2

 

I am losing time
it may already be
gone

so i say to you now
even though it is
wrong

i like you more than i
should

 


 

I’m sure it will pass
is what i
said to people

but deep down
i knew it wouldn’t

this wasn’t going anywhere

and i didn’t know
whether that gave me
comfort
or if it scared me to
the point
where it became
too much

 


 

The hint of pine
rushes to my nose
deeper now than
ever before

i press further
into the brush
leaving behind
everything
i was

the ground ahead
completely untouched
ready for me
and i
for it

 

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she kept watch as if
every living thing was
a threat

but the threat was
the one she trusted
most

– AJT


 

he watched her like she was
a blade of grass
safe from thought;
simplistic, beautiful

she was his
no one else’s
he needed to tell her so

his palms were beginning to sweat
there was no other way

he clenched his fist

– AJT


 

Words.

often used;
rarely understood

– AJT

 

Website freedom design

 

We were sun kissed
and foolish
and never once
did we wish to be
anything else

 


 

It’s odd isn’t it
how we find ourselves in these
little predicaments of attraction

to those who we have
no place in exposing
our hearts to

 


 

I think i am stuck somewhere
half in, half out
afraid of committing
scared of something
at least

 

Website freedom design7

 

I enter the shallows and
my body cools with every
progressive step

I break the water’s placid
surface and feel the
ripples twirl against
my moving limbs

It is calm, as am i

The constant breeze,
freezing this moment
just for me

 


 

I have been by myself
all this time because
when you ask me
all your questions

i want to make sure
that i have all the
answers

 


 

Understand
that we aren’t
all destined
to be in this world
for too long

 

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I look at you
you at me
and something happens

time stops
just for a second

and we hold each other’s
gaze like it’s the
last thing
we will ever do

 


 

Sometimes,
i find myself wandering.

Not because i am lost,
more so because the
places i am familiar with

no longer
excite me

 


 

Explanations for your decisions
aren’t always a
necessity.

People will always
ask questions;
let them.

 

Website freedom design5

 

Darkness only scares
me when i think about
it too much.

Otherwise,
i just become a part of it.

Another shadow;
a darkness of my own.

 


 

It’s 12:01,
and i wonder if
you ever look
at the time
and think of
me.

 


 

I am a realist in a
generation of dreamers.

And i sit here,
by the window
in a coffee shop
with a dreamer

and i don’t know
who i’d rather be.

 

Website freedom design4

 

I can’t cope
with the idea
of temporary

 


 

I guess you could say
i’ve become a recluse.

Not lonely;
just consumed
with myself.

 


 

Darkness.

My fingertips trace my brow
my body, adjusting
the chilled air now apparent to
my senses.

Inhale.

The winds outside, whisper to me
the words clutch to my lips
but do not leave,
my chest
tight.

Exhale.

The night before flickers
i place my hand on his back
and this is my comfort, here,
right now.

Light.

 

Website freedom design3
That day in the meadow,
do you remember?

With the blades of grass so green
it was as if they had been painted by hand,
one by one.

And the whistle of the wind
against the surface of the water
letting us know that Winter
would soon be here.

But it wasn’t the grass,
or the wind,
or the water for that matter
that absorbed me so deeply
beyond control.

It was you.

 


 

Sometimes,
just sometimes,
i think of the rain
and wonder
if we were all really
meant to be
here

 


 

Come sit with me, on the windowsill
and we’ll listen to Bon Iver
fingertips touching.

Come sit with me, on the windowsill
and we’ll dangle our legs
cool breeze, calming.

Come sit with me, on the windowsill
and we’ll get lost in the clouds
slipping away;
at ease.

 

Website freedom design1
I was alone again
for breakfast this morning.
And i write this, not because
i’m lonely,
but because i think
breakfast would be better
with you here

 


 

If i were to close my eyes
i think my layers would become reeds.
So i think i’ll keep them open,
only slightly,
and just for now

 


 

It had been so long since i
navigated your features from
across the room.

But you din’t know i did that;
never would.

 

Website freedom design2
I crept outside
and told the night sky that
i loved you
and it was
invigorating

 


 
We shook hands like old friends
but the feelings that drifted though me
when our hands touched;
they were
foreign

 


 

almost

I almost told you
and now that almost
will haunt me;
always

 

Website freedom design2

 

They said i had potential.
But they said that to you too;
didn’t they.

 


 

open windows and summer winds
with smells of citrus
and hints of bare skin
as we dance between
claps of thunder
and flashes of white
our souls
alive.


 

My mother;
seasoned to endure every emotion
every heartbreak

though i see her sometimes
when she thinks she is alone
with a tear in her eye

and it’s then i realise
she is hurting
just like me.

 

Website freedom design1
There is truth in
silence.

But there is also
hurt.

 


 

The fear i conjure
between thoughts seems
to possess me
more than anything else.

 


 
He would whisper in the dark
out of fear the world
would hear him.

But he feared not their
judgements nor
their questions,
but their truth.

For he accepted they already knew,
though he had just hoped
that they still saw him
as they had
before.

 

Website freedom design
People don’t understand me
and i am glad, because
it means i am
doing something
right.

 


I am starting to feel nothing again.
And i don’t know why
but this time it feels
like the last.

 


 

No one likes to be alone
but we who can adapt
to such a life
learn how to live with it
and still be
happy.

 

Website freedom design
To the lady down the road
with a smile on her face and
a skip in her step.

To the man in the home
with a plastic tube in his arm and
flowers by his bed.

To the children outside
with no care in the world;
running wild.

To you i am but a stranger,
though to me
you are life
in both it’s truest and
most vulnerable form.

 


 

My mother was everything,
but i didn’t tell her
and now she’s gone.

 


I hope that when i speak the words,
you understand just how hard it was to say them
to you.

 

Website freedom design

 

And the road ended, just like that.
No signs, no warning;
just an abrupt visual
of nothingness.

 


 

Speak up, stay quiet.
It doesn’t matter.
People will always expect
more.

 


 

Long roads and gunshots.
You see one, hear the other.

A car breaks, a body drops.
A heart races, another stops.

 

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